We’re witnessing an epidemic of division in America, one that’s grown rapidly since the 2016 election and continues to snowball. This intense polarization affects all aspects of life, but it’s especially harmful to our mental health. In psychological terms, “polarization” describes when beliefs become more extreme after discussion. Think about that: after we debate a point, we’re often more entrenched in our stance, even when it’s unhealthy.
The constant divisive rhetoric we’ve seen since 2016, coupled with the rise of social media, amplifies this effect. Social media has become mainstream across age groups, giving each of us instant access to discussions—and arguments. The more you engage with that stranger in the comments section or the disturbing meme on your feed, the more committed you become to your own beliefs. Now, multiply that by millions of people doing the same thing daily.
On top of the personal emotional toll, we also have fear-based propaganda bombarding us, making people suspicious, angry, and fearful of each other. History shows us how powerful fear and propaganda can be. We’ve seen it play out in other countries where entire societies were turned against each other. Here in the U.S., we’re falling into this “us vs. them” mentality, even turning against friends, family, and neighbors over political ideology.
Political discussions used to be something to avoid unless you knew you were on the same page. But in recent years, the disdain that one side has for the other has become malignant. “MAGA or Liberal? Democrat or Republican?” It’s tearing apart friendships, families, and communities. Imagine Mary avoiding her Uncle Joe’s house for Thanksgiving because he’s voting for Donald Trump, so he “must be a racist.” Uncle Joe, in turn, thinks Mary’s one of those “woke libs” who doesn’t understand real issues.
This article isn’t about choosing sides or debating policies. Instead, it’s about stopping the bleed, putting an end to the damage this is doing to our mental health and our social bonds. I’m not saying everything you hear is propaganda or that you shouldn’t hold strong beliefs. But I am saying we need to stop seeing each other as the enemy. When we allow ourselves to hate and divide over beliefs, we’re doing exactly what the “propaganda machine” hopes we will. The more we despise each other, the more power they gain. It’s time to get off the wheel, for the sake of our mental health and our communities.
How to Challenge Polarization
So, how do we fix this? We start by remembering each other’s humanity.
1. Find the Common Ground
Let’s start by acknowledging a simple truth: we’re all afraid of something. Instead of immediately arguing, try asking someone on the other side what they fear, what they believe, or what they want for the future. If we listen—really listen—we may discover that, although our views differ, we’re all aiming for many of the same things.
2. Accept Different Perspectives Without Losing Respect
This polarized mindset has led many of us to believe that if someone’s on the other side, they’re inherently “bad,” that they don’t care about the same things we do, or even that they’re actively seeking to destroy our values. Most of the time, that isn’t the case at all. In my experience, many people have the same core desires; they just have different beliefs about how to get there.
Think of it this way: have you ever been on a car ride with someone and argued about the “best” way to get there? “Why go that way? This way is shorter!” Both of you want to reach the same destination; you just have different ideas about how to get there. We’ve stopped realizing that we have the same endpoint, and this has led to a complete lack of openness toward any other approach.
3. Challenge Cognitive Dissonance
Cognitive dissonance refers to the discomfort we feel when holding conflicting beliefs or information. We can get so deeply rooted in our beliefs that any contradictory fact feels like an attack. We rationalize our views and even our anger toward “the other side,” holding on tighter rather than reassessing.
So, here’s the challenge: Allow yourself to be wrong. Allow yourself to understand a different perspective, even if you don’t agree. Every day, find a piece of common ground with someone who thinks differently than you do. Get to know their fears and beliefs without immediately dismissing them.
Let’s Make America Kind Again
I’ve watched people call each other “disgusting” or “stupid” over political disagreements, accusing the other of being “brainwashed” or “ignorant.” If we want to stop this vicious cycle, we need to remember that it’s possible to be friends, family, and neighbors even with those we don’t politically align with. Ask yourself, “Why might Uncle Joe support that candidate? What message resonates with him?” You don’t have to agree with him to respect and accept him as a person.
It’s time to stop identifying with sides and start recognizing each other as people. We need to challenge ourselves daily to step back from the anger and divisiveness and bring kindness back into our interactions. By doing so, we can stop the cycle of fear and resentment, preserve our mental health, and rebuild the social bonds that make America strong.